What Is a Get? Jewish Divorce Explained

A Jewish marriage is created through a specific halachic (legal-religious) process. It can only be dissolved through a specific halachic process too. A civil divorce — from a court, signed by a judge — dissolves the civil marriage. But under Jewish law, the couple remains married until a get is written, delivered, and accepted.

What a Get Is

A get is a handwritten document, composed by a sofer (scribe) in the presence of a beit din (rabbinical court), in which the husband releases the wife from the marriage. The document is written in Aramaic, follows a precise formula that has not changed in over a thousand years, and must contain specific identifying details about both parties.

The get is written fresh for each divorce — it is not a form or template. The scribe writes it by hand with a quill on parchment, and the husband formally authorizes it.

How the Process Works

1. Both parties agree to divorce (ideally) and arrange a get through a beit din
2. The beit din convenes — typically three rabbis who oversee the process
3. The sofer writes the get in the presence of the beit din, following the husband's verbal instruction
4. Two witnesses sign the document
5. The husband gives the get to the wife — physically placing it in her hands or having an agent (shaliach) deliver it
6. The wife accepts it — she lifts her hands, walks a few steps with it, and it is done
7. The beit din cuts the get to prevent reuse and files it

The entire ceremony takes about an hour. Both parties must participate willingly — coerced consent invalidates the get.

Why Civil Divorce Is Not Enough

Under Jewish law, a civil divorce has no halachic standing. A couple divorced by a court but without a get is still married according to halacha. This creates serious consequences:

• The woman cannot remarry in an Orthodox ceremony
• If she has children with another man without a get, those children are considered mamzerim (a complex halachic status that restricts their marriage options for generations)
• The man is also technically still married, though the halachic consequences for him are less severe (a historical asymmetry that is the source of ongoing communal anguish)

The Agunah Crisis

An agunah (literally "chained woman") is a woman whose husband refuses to give her a get. He may use it as leverage in custody disputes, financial negotiations, or simply out of spite. Without the get, she cannot move on with her life within the Orthodox framework.

This is one of the most painful and widely discussed issues in the Orthodox world:

• Communal pressure — rabbis, community leaders, and organizations publicly pressure recalcitrant husbands. Some communities issue public notices (siruv) declaring a man in contempt of the beit din.
• Prenuptial agreements — increasingly common, these halachic prenups (pioneered by the Beth Din of America) create financial consequences for refusing a get, making refusal economically untenable.
• Legal action — some states (including New York) have laws addressing get refusal. NY's "Get Law" allows courts to consider get refusal in equitable distribution of assets.
• Advocacy organizations — groups like ORA (Organization for the Resolution of Agunot) work to resolve individual cases and advocate for systemic solutions.

The prenuptial agreement is now standard in many Modern Orthodox communities. Rabbis increasingly refuse to officiate weddings without one. In Hasidic and Yeshivish communities, adoption is slower but growing.

What Both Parties Should Know

For women: A get should be arranged as part of the divorce process, ideally simultaneously with or shortly after the civil divorce. Do not assume the get will happen automatically — pursue it actively through a beit din.

For men: Withholding a get is considered one of the most serious moral violations in Jewish law. Multiple halachic authorities across centuries have condemned it. The communal, social, and increasingly legal consequences are severe.

For lawyers: If you represent an Orthodox client in a divorce, raise the get early. It should be addressed in the settlement agreement. In New York, the "Barriers to Remarriage" statute (DRL 253) requires both parties to remove all barriers to the other's remarriage before the civil divorce is finalized.

For legal professionals working on cases involving get refusal or Orthodox divorce, cultural consulting is available.