Shabbat — The Jewish Day of Rest Explained

If I had to explain Shabbat to someone who has never experienced it, I would say this: imagine that every single week, without fail, the entire world stops. No telephone or any other business interruptions. It's the whole family sitting together eating and singing Shabbat songs to Hashem with warmth and love. That is Shabbat in my home, and in every Orthodox Jewish home I know.

Shabbat (the Sabbath) is the single most important institution in Orthodox Jewish life. Every week, from sunset on Friday to nightfall on Saturday, we enter a completely different mode of existence. The phones go off. The cars stay parked. The ovens are set in advance. And for about 25 hours, our family gathers, prays, eats, studies, and rests.

If you only learn about one aspect of Orthodox Jewish life, let it be Shabbat. It is the heartbeat of everything.

What Happens on Shabbat?

Friday Afternoon: Preparation

The entire week builds toward Shabbat. In my house, Thursday night is when the mental list starts forming, and by Friday morning, the kitchen is in full gear. My cholent goes on the blech (a metal sheet that covers the stovetop) before Shabbat starts — it will sit there simmering all night, filling the house with the most incredible smell by Saturday morning. If you have never woken up to the aroma of cholent that has been warming since Friday afternoon, you are missing one of life's great pleasures.

The pace quickens on Friday:

• The house is cleaned from top to bottom
• Special meals are prepared — the challahs are baked (or bought, no judgment!), the chicken is roasting, the salads are made
• The table is set with our best dishes and a white tablecloth
• Candles are prepared (typically two, lit by the woman of the house)
• Everyone showers and dresses in their finest Shabbat clothes

My children get so excited for Shabbat. They know it means the special grape juice, the candy after shul, Tatty being home all day. My youngest starts asking "Is it Shabbat yet?" from Thursday. There is something so pure about a child who genuinely cannot wait for a day with no screens, no errands — just family and Hashem.

There is a beautiful Hebrew expression: "Those who prepare before Shabbat will eat on Shabbat." The preparation itself is part of honoring the day.

Friday Evening: Welcoming Shabbat

Candle Lighting: Eighteen minutes before sunset, I light the Shabbat candles and recite a blessing. I want to be honest with you about this moment — it is the most powerful moment of my entire week. I strike the match, light the candles, draw the light toward me three times with my hands, cover my eyes, and I daven. In those seconds, the whole world falls away. I pray for my husband, for each of my children by name, for my parents, for anyone who needs a refuah. Every Jewish woman who lights candles knows this feeling. It is our special mitzvah, passed down from Sarah Imeinu herself.

Synagogue: The men and boys head to shul for Kabbalat Shabbat — a series of psalms welcoming the Sabbath, climaxing in the hauntingly beautiful Lecha Dodi hymn, where the congregation turns toward the door to greet the Shabbat Queen.

The Friday Night Meal: This is the crown jewel of the week. Everyone gathers around the table. My husband blesses each of our children, placing his hands on their heads. You should see their faces — even my teenagers still close their eyes for this. Kiddush (a blessing over wine) is recited. Challah (braided bread) is blessed and shared. Multiple courses follow — in my house it is usually gefilte fish, chicken soup with kneidlach, a main course with chicken or meat, side dishes, and dessert. Between courses, we sing zemirot (Shabbat songs) together. Words of Torah are shared. The meal can last two hours or more, and nobody minds, because where else do you need to be?

Saturday: The Day Itself

Morning: Shacharit services are longer on Shabbat, including the Torah reading. The service is followed by a kiddush (refreshments) at the synagogue — this is prime socializing time in our community.

Shabbat Lunch: Another festive meal, and this is when the cholent finally makes its grand entrance. That pot has been sitting on the blech since Friday, and by now the potatoes have melted into the beans and the meat falls apart with a fork. Guests are common — in our neighborhood, it is completely normal to invite someone you barely know. Songs are sung. Torah is discussed. The table is full and loud and wonderful.

Afternoon: This is my favorite part of Shabbat, if I am honest. The afternoon stretches out with nothing to do and nowhere to be. I might nap. I might read. My children play outside with the neighborhood kids. Adults visit friends and family or take walks. There is no schedule, no agenda, no screen competing for attention. And here is the thing that surprises people — the quiet. In my neighborhood in Brooklyn, you can hear the quiet. Everyone is walking, no cars driving by. Children playing in the street. It is a completely different world from the rest of the week.

Seudah Shlishit: A third, lighter meal in the late afternoon, often at the synagogue. The atmosphere is contemplative as Shabbat draws to a close.

Havdalah: After three stars appear in the Saturday night sky, Shabbat ends with the Havdalah ceremony — blessings over wine, fragrant spices (to comfort the soul as Shabbat departs), and a braided candle. My kids love holding up their fingers to the flame, seeing the light reflected in their fingernails. And just like that, the week begins again.

What Can't You Do on Shabbat?

The Torah states: "Six days you shall work, and on the seventh day you shall rest." The Talmud identifies 39 categories of creative work (melachot) that are prohibited on Shabbat. These include:

• Writing and erasing
• Cooking and baking
• Sewing and tearing
• Building and demolishing
• Lighting and extinguishing fire (this is why we don't flip light switches, drive cars, or use most electronics)
• Carrying in a public domain (unless an eruv — a symbolic enclosure — surrounds the area)

I know from the outside it can sound like a lot of restrictions. But let me tell you what it actually feels like from the inside: freedom. When you literally cannot check your email, cannot scroll through your phone, cannot run to the store — you are free. Free to be fully present with your family. Free to just exist without producing anything. It is the most countercultural, radical thing we do, and I would not trade it for anything.

The guiding principle is not "rest" in the modern sense of lounging around. It is the cessation of creative, productive activity — acknowledging that G-d created the world in six days and rested on the seventh.

Why Is Shabbat So Important?

It is a gift. The Talmud describes Shabbat as a precious gift that G-d gave to the Jewish people. In a world that never stops, Shabbat forces you to stop. And every single week, I am grateful for it.

Family time. No telephone or any other business interruptions. Every single week, guaranteed, my family sits together for unhurried meals without the distraction of phones, TV, or work. In a world where families struggle to eat dinner together even once a week, we do it three times every Shabbat.

Spiritual reset. The weekday world fades. Worries about work, money, and the news are set aside. You are reminded of what truly matters.

Community. This is something you have to see to believe. Everyone in the neighborhood is keeping Shabbat together. The streets fill with families walking to synagogue. Children are everywhere. Neighbors visit each other. You wave to people, you stop to talk, you actually see each other's faces instead of the tops of each other's heads bent over phones. There is a shared rhythm that creates deep bonds.

Identity. The Talmud says: "More than the Jews have kept Shabbat, Shabbat has kept the Jews." Through centuries of exile and persecution, the weekly observance of Shabbat preserved Jewish identity when everything else was stripped away. When I light those candles on Friday night, I am doing exactly what my grandmother did, and her grandmother before her.

The Modern Challenge

Shabbat observance is arguably the most countercultural thing we do as Orthodox Jews. In a world designed for 24/7 connectivity, choosing to go completely offline for 25 hours every week is radical.

And yet, many people — including non-Orthodox Jews and even non-Jews — have begun adopting elements of a "digital Sabbath," recognizing what we have known for millennia: human beings need regular, complete rest from the relentless pace of modern life.

The difference is that for us, this is not a lifestyle choice or a wellness trend. It is a commandment. And that is what makes it powerful — you keep Shabbat not because you feel like it, but because it is what you are called to do. And in the doing, you discover why it matters. Trust me on this one.